The Progression of Parenthood

When did I go from only letting the children out of the house dressed like this...

...to letting them leave the house like this? This is how she fixed her hair to run errands today. And I was okay with it.

The first few years of parenthood were spent spiffing the kids up in matching, clean clothes. They never left the house in anything that didn't match. That digressed to letting them wear whatever they wanted while we were at home. And that digressed to letting them wear whatever they wanted pretty much any time of the day. I still have the final say over what is worn on special occasions or holidays, picture days, and church days. I am pretty vigilant at catching someone trying to smuggle a tiara to church or holey jeans to family photos. Other than that, they can pretty much use their creativity with their appearances.

When Mallory appeared today, she was so proud of herself for the "fancy" (as she called it) hairstyle she created. As much as I cringed, how could I crush her accomplishment and feelings of self-worth? So I asked myself, "What's the harm?" In the end, there wasn't any. There was no harm letting her parade her fancy hair at the electronics store. And no one ever laughed or said anything about the fancy hairdo. I doubt anyone thought a thing of it.

I recently had the chance to visit with a life-long friend and meet his beautiful family. Their three year old showed up wearing one sneaker and one sandal (in the snow). Did I think he was weird or his parents were too liberal? Not in the least. I thought it was cute!

It's taken almost 12 years of parenting to learn to let some things go - fancy hair and all!

Little Sucker

Guess who is putting herself to sleep by sucking her thumb now?

I've never had a thumb sucker. So cute!

April Fool's Fun

It's the most wonderful time of the year... April Fool's Day! All week the kids have been taking sides. We've heard, "I'm on Mom's team!" and "I'm on Dad's team!" at the house. Ross even said, "This is our second favorite holiday after Christmas." We have had a lot of fun with it in years' past, so the kids really anticipated it this year. Here is a synopsis of some of our Tom Foolery:

• Drew put some of his (clean) underwear on Mallory's arms while she slept.


• Edward stuffed tissues in the tips of Drew's shoes.


• Edward and Elizabeth saran wrapped the boys' doorway. Ross could see it but Drew didn't. It startled him a bit.


• I drew mustaches and beards on Mallory, Drew, and Elizabeth with eye liner. I tried to get Ross, but he woke up. That kid can sleep through numerous finger sticks each night, but that eye liner really tickled his lip! And Elizabeth woke up and asked what I was doing in her room at 1:00 a.m., but I muttered I was just kissing them good night. She bought it, and I laughed.


• Mallory did a ginormous, man-sized toot this morning. I said, "Mallory! Whoa!" She giggled and said, "April Fool's!"


• My favorite one was pulled off when I picked Elizabeth and Drew up from school. Apparently just my mere breathing is mortifying to Elizabeth. I embarrass her daily without even trying. So I wore a bicycle helment as I drove to pick her up today. Priceless. The pick-up duty teacher was laughing. Elizabeth yelled, "You're ruining my life!" as she got in the van. I'd say it was a successful prank!


• I created some fake poo using ripped up wet toilet paper tubes. Everyone but Mallory knew it was fake. She came in the bathroom this morning, and her eyes were immediately drawn to the turd on the toilet. She whispered, "Poop."

Edward tinted the milk green with food coloring.

I snuck over to Andrea and Tommie's house and hung a sign on their house that read, "Welcome Home Waddell Family - Winners of the 2010 Missouri Duck Calling Competition"

And perhaps the best prank was pulled off by Mallory! Edward and I will be attending our church's semi-annual General Conference in Salt Lake City on Sunday. We secured our tickets, and they arrived yesterday. They were in an envelope, and I set them down with our mail yesterday. As Edward was clearing off the table for dinner last night, he noticed that the tickets were missing. He and I tore the house apart looking for them after the kids were put to bed. He even went through the trash. All night we kept asking the big kids if they had anything to do with their disappearance, and we could tell they honestly had not. I asked Edward if he had done it, and he, too, sincerely had not. This morning he found them in one of the kitchen cabinets. At dinner tonight, I again quizzed everyone to find out who did it. Mallory smiled and said, "I did!" I thought she was joking so I asked where she hid them. I then asked Edward where he found them, and they were one in the same.

That's my girl!

My Cute Creation!

At our house, we really feel strongly about teaching our kids how to work. They all have daily chores. We feel they will benefit as adults if they learn how to work when they are young. The older they get, the more they despise chores. Too bad! Mallory is still at the age that it is a treat to get to do chores. She is more than excited if I ask her to help me dust or fold washcloths. Ross is now at the age that it's as if I told him to swim through a shark infested pool when I tell him it's chore time.

We wanted to get an early start with teaching Lucy how to work. I came up with an age appropriate chore for her. I found a dusting rag at the dollar store. I cut it up and sewed it to this thrifted outfit. As she has tummy time, she will be able to help clean our floors! And with a household of seven people, our floors get really dirty really fast! When she starts scooting and crawling within the next few months, she'll have the floors shining in no time. It's a win-win situation!

My Cute Creation

April Fool's!

This is really a product in Japan.

More Crazy Things I've Heard...

*Lizzy, can you feed me grapes like a princess? (Mallory)

*Mom! A Jesus clock! Can I please get it for my birthday?! Then I can see Him all the time! (Mallory)

*When I grow up, I'm going to be a cop so I can pull people over and say, "April Fool's!" (Ross)

*Mallory: Do you know what I want to be when I grow up?

Me: I don't know.

Mallory: A big giant meerkat. Do you know who I will marry?

Me: Um... Barney.

Mallory: No, Silly! Another meerkat.

*Doesn't my mouth sound like I have sand in it? (Mallory)

*My heart just breaks for hobos. Whenever I see them I feel guilty because I have a lot of things, and all they have is a box to live in. (Elizabeth)

*You can corndog your friends, but you can't corndog your family. (Edward)

Alien Encounters

While travelling one day last week, Mallory and I had this conversation:

Mallory: Do we have to be nice to mean aliens?

Me: Well, no.

Mallory: They were wrong then in Primary (children's Sunday school at our church). They said we had to be nice to everyone.

Well, Mallory... you have my permission to not befriend aliens. :)

This Week's Crazy Things...

*Can I do my hair in corn rows some time? (Mallory)

*I don't like it when you sing low. It sounds like you're a woman pretending to be a man. (Elizabeth)

*But, Mom. If I just itch my nose, boogers will come out. (Mallory)

*I counted 89 dead-fish trees (blooming Bradford Pears) on my way to PAGES today. (Elizabeth)

*-Are you losing your voice, Mom? (Ross)

-Sounds like it. (Me)

-But if you lose your voice than you die! (Mallory)

3 Months

*Little Lady is three months old and such a delight. She truly makes our home a happy one.

*Within the last month she has started taking a paci like a champ (Woot! Woot!). She came through for me in the knick of time. She will be taking her first airplane ride next week, and I really needed to be able to plug her up quickly for my sanity! Thanks, Lucy!

*She has also started sucking her thumb. I think it's darling. I don't have a preference of thumb or paci - both have their pros and cons. As long as she has some way to calm herself, I'm a happy mommy.

*I think she is going to have curly hair. It's super curly on top when she gets out of the bathtub. She usually has a crazy curl on top. Love it.

*And she is a smiley little thing, especially when her momma is around.

Enjoy!

Indoor Pool - More Fun With Water

Something about a 70 degree day after a cold and snowy winter makes the kids want to break out the slip 'n slide and swimsuits. Mean ol' mom always crushes their dreams. Drew decided to bring the fun inside, choosing to be obedient by not creating a water world outdoors.

We recently purchased a new tv. The ginormous box has been taking up space in our living room as a make shift fort/cave/play house. Every kid loves a big empty box. I didn't even notice that the box disappeared out of the living room. I know, I'm just observant like that.

Last night when Edward got home from work, he found the box upstairs in the kids bathroom - filled with water. Drew decided to make an indoor pool. I don't know how long it had been filled with water. It was not long enough to cause a flood (thank heavens), but it was just long enough to make the box nice and soggy - thus ending its fort/cave/playhouse days.

I guess the bright side is there won't be a ginormous box sitting in my living room anymore!

Good One, Drew

I walked into the kitchen tonight to find Drew and Mallory standing in chairs pulled up to the sink. Water was EVERY WHERE, and Drew was holding the sprayer in his hand. I demanded, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!" Drew replied, "Muscle spasm."

I had to give it to him. That was a pretty good response! After five children, I've certainly never heard that one before.

More Crazy Things I've Heard This Week

-Mom! That scares me when you put that on! Don't look at me! (Mallory, said to me while applying my under eye concealer)

-Any men you see on t.v. are wearing make-up, and it's totally legal. (Elizabeth)
-Unless it's HD.... Even football players. (Drew)

-Mallory, wait a minute.(Edward) I can't! I don't have any horsies! (Mallory, as in "hold your horses")

-I want to be a humanitarian when I grow up and help kids from the streets find homes. It breaks my heart to see hobos. (Elizabeth)

-Please bless Daddy so he won't get fired. (Mallory, said during family prayer)

These are the things I heard while the kids were watching King Kong:

-Monkeys are really talented. (Drew) Well, the DO have imposable thumbs. (Elizabeth)

-I think he's gonna eat her and poop her out then fall in love with her 'cause she'll look all ugly. (Mallory)

Piano Man

We are mean parents that make our kids take piano lessons. They don't really enjoy them. That's a shame.

This is Drew's piano book. It was mine when I was a child, hence the tattered cover. Drew made his feelings known about the piano.

Let's take a closer look:
"Noo (That would be NOOOOOOO!)
This is poopey"

This Week's Crazy Things

-I wish I had matching gloves. My gloves are blue, but my shorts are red. (Mallory, said while playing wii boxing)

-Me: "I love you, honey!" Mallory: "I'm not your honey! Daddy is your honey. I am your daughter. Daughters are called daughters, and sons are called sons!"

-I'm going to take this little rock home and plant it and grow a big tree. (Mallory)

-Mom, can I listen to some smooth jazz? (Drew)

-That's for a fat girl. (Mallory, said while clothes shopping)

The following things were said while Elizabeth and Mallory enlisted Edward's help to put on a play at my parents' house.

-Grammy, do you have anything that looks like throw-up? (Elizabeth, said while gathering props)

-Our play is called, The Englishman and His Two Daughters That Made Him Floss His Toes. (Elizabeth)

-It's my mustache, can't you tell? It's made out of paper and tape! (Edward)

-But I don't know how to floss his toes. (Mallory)

Two Months

Sweet cheeks is 2 months old! She is 12 lbs. 5 oz. and 22 1/4 inches long.

Growing like a weed!

Crazy Things I Heard This Week

-Are all drunk people fat? (Drew)


-Who are your grand kids, Mommy? (Mallory)


-Mommy, why are you eating barf!?! (Mallory {And I wasn't. It was spinach and artichoke hummus.})


-Hey, Ross. You know that time we had country fried steak at school? Well, it was just a hamburger with a couple of crumbs on it. (My nephew, Harrison)


-Said during a prayer, "...and thank you for Ross. And thank you for Elizabeth. And thank you for Drew. And thank you for me because I'm the goodest kid...." (Mallory)


-You don't have to cry about it, Lucy. (Drew)


-Maybe a hobo snuck in and stole all the water. (Elizabeth)


-Your baby has a very nice chin. (Nurse)


-Look who it is, Lucy! It's me, Mallory - your favorite person! (Mallory)



I'm glad Mallory has such high self-esteem.

Lucy's Blessing

The first weekend of February was a happy one for our family. Baby Lucy was blessed at church, and we had a houseful of family and friends to help us celebrate.

Lucy's beautiful blessing gown was made by a friend from church. This is the same friend that made Mallory's blessing gown.

Four of Edward's siblings and their families as well as his mom and step-father made the trip to celebrate this special occasion with us. Saturday night we had 29 people sleeping at our house. The 19 cousins that were here had a great time catching up with each other.

Sweet Lauren meeting Lucy

Four of the five cousins born in 2010

Rex, Ruby, Lucy, and Emme

#2 and #4

Caroline and Ross

Mallory and her Ellie

Rex couldn't help but chew on Lucy.

Some of the boys talking Pokemon

Lucy, Jani, and Papa Otto

Lucy puts their combined grandchild count somewhere in the 30s. I have lost track.

Papa Otto and Mallory

This is the group shot of our family and friends that came to Lucy's blessing, minus my grandma and a few aunts and uncles. Big families are the best!

A Second Installment of Crazy Things Are Spoken Here

Here are the crazy things that have been said at our house this week.

Because I love the taste of wood glue.

Can I go to a real barber? 'Cause you're not a professor of hairtology.

"But Mom, I'm not going to remember." "Son, I promise I will remember." "But old people forget a lot."

Mmmm. This bacon tastes really good. Like it's from a fancy hotel - not one of those cockroach hotels. And I've been to a cockroach hotel.

How can you tell if someone's been sleeping in your bed? (Asked after being told the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.)

Is this where Jesus was born? (Asked during a funeral at a Catholic church.)

Mallory, you just got schooled by our thirty-five year old dad. And their brains don't even work that well.

Jews can't have meat on Fridays.

It's always exciting around here.

Light As A Feather. Stiff As A Board.

After discovering Mallory's amazing feats of flexibility, we've now learned that baby Lucy has an incredible talent as well. When you hold her in the air, she extends her legs straight behind her.

I see a future in the circus!

Crazy Things Are Spoken Here

These are just a few of the wacky things I've heard around the house this week:

-Do you like my toe people?
-Stop touching his underwear! Do you want to buy him new underwear?
-"Bless you" me, Mom.
-Do monsters not like toots?
-This tastes like a zebra.
-At least snot didn't come out!
-I really hope that's chocolate.
-Mom, Mallory cut her pants.
-You're small, but you're densely compacted.
-Mom, you're weird. Lizzy gets the weird from you.
-You are crinkly.
-I can't wait to go through puberty! (One guess as to which kid said that.)

Once again, this place is a zoo.

7

Happy birthday, to our funny little man!